Friday, May 12, 2006
RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE
I’m no commuter, so I’m not as afflicted as I probably would be – if I strayed from my ever-shrinking quadrant. Sure, I’ve been known to let the odd expletive slip out. But only sometimes. And I’ve found myself getting hot under the collar if someone stops at a yellow light (c’mon, you had time!) or slows for no reason (get a map!). And of course I can’t ignore the bizarre correlation between drivers of a certain height and bad drivers. It’s true! No offense to those who are shorter in stature, but next time you’re behind a particularly annoying car, note where the top of the driver’s head hits. Maybe they’re slouching. Or, not. Anyway…lately I’ve tried a new tack – ignoring. As my grandmother used to say, “it’s faster than walking”. So I’ve tried taking deep breaths and letting any potential road rage situations roll gently off my shoulders.
So far, I’ve been called a c**t (sorry, this is a family-friendly blog) because I failed to signal. A bitch (I can say that) for going through an intersection – when it was my turn. And today I pulled up a stop sign around the corner from my house and was practically accosted. Honestly!
I didn’t get too far. As I said, they’re short blocks. And then I panicked. What if he took my license plate? Tracked me down to make a citizen’s arrest? What if I am a dangerous driver? I know I can be a little flighty sometimes, especially if it’s pissing down with rain or a good tune comes on the radio. But can’t everybody?
Next weekend is a long one. Then first of the summer. And when summer comes to Canada, Canada hits the streets. In their cars. So buckle up people, it’s gonna be a hot one. It’s gonna f**king rage….